5 Worst Things About The 'True Blood' Finale
With "True Blood" wrapping up for the season (Boo!), our finale left us with both a lot of surprises, a few answers (some, not many), but mostly, a whole lot of open storylines. Fankly trying to follow this many stories is really starting to distract me from all the naked butts and vampire sex, so here's my top 5 I'd like to see get wrapped up and gone.
Beware of spoilers!
1) Luna’s human shifting:
Now, this is a cool idea. It could actually take the show in a whole other direction, and really open up storyline possibilities for Sam and other shifters. But it probably won’t, because apparently only Luna seems to hold this special ability, and honestly, all I can think about when Luna is on the screen is how much I wish Luna were off the screen. Getcho baby back and get out of Sam’s life!
2) Andy’s new passel of infants:
Four baby girls? Now, don’t get me wrong, I kind of enjoyed the scene of Maurella giving birth—for obvious reasons (is it hot in here?)—but producing four infants and passing them along to Andy for upbringing? I’m sensing an attempt to give Andy a larger storyline, which is great because he’s kind of an underplayed character, but if it hinges around babies and flashing light in the diaper jokes, count me out.
3) Jason’s tripping out about his parents:
What’s this going to end up being about? Are we seeing the actual incarnations of Mr. and Mrs. Stackhouse, or are we witnessing Jason’s breakdown? My bet is on the latter, because honestly, if they’re really there, why wouldn’t they just tell Jason about Warlow and spill the secrets already? Too easy.
But regardless of whether they actually exist or not, they’re clearly egging Jason on in a pretty dangerous direction. How long until he turns on Jessica? Or Tara? Can we still love a bloodthirsty Jason?
Does anyone actually like her? Go ahead, speak up, feel free to venture your own opinion, because I’m open to being convinced. So far, however, I haven’t seen any redeeming qualities in her beside being nice to look at. All she’s done has been to really eff things up for Eric, and then sleep with him. Her brother, by the way. So aside from adding the icky incestuous factor (okay, not biological, but still ew!) and making marveling at how she runs around in those boots (is it vampire magic?), all Nora is doing is detracting from opportunities for Eric and Sookie to get it on.
5) Bill’s Insanity:
Does anyone else remember when Bill was a sweet, Southern gentleman who drawled the name “Sookie” and just happened to be a vampire? This is the guy who would have protected Sookie with his life, if he had one. Now he’s some ancient blood-guzzling uber religious psychopath set on the utter destruction of mortals?
I’m bored, can we have Bill back before this thing goes too far? Good luck, HBO, coming up with a satisfying ending to that one that makes any semblance of sense. I miss the good, old-fashioned love triangle that kept me tuning in the first few seasons.
…And yet, for my complaints, I can’t wait until next season to see what happens. What do you think, fellow "True Blood" fans? Which stories should stay and which should go?