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Seasons

15. Satellite Delay or Nose-Drinking?

December 1, 2009

Would you rather have to live your life on a three-second satellite time-delay OR only be able to drink out of your nose?

14. Pants-Peeing or Poetry Slam?

December 1, 2009

Would you rather pee your pants every time a phone rings more than three times OR you can only order food in a restaurant in the style of poetry slam?

13. Make Your Own Clothes or Gentleman Dandy?

December 1, 2009

Would you rather have to make all of your own clothes OR observe old-timey courtship etiquette?

12. Napoleon or Larry King?

December 1, 2009

Would you rather have to defeat Napoleon in a game of RISK every night before you can go to bed OR take Larry King with you on all of your vacations?

11. Salty Old Sea Captain or Doc Holliday?

December 1, 2009

Would you rather have all of your e-mails read to you by a salty old sea captain OR whenever you play poker you become Doc Holliday

10. Wheelbarrow or Ewoks?

December 1, 2009

Would you rather have to have your grandfather wheel you around in a wheelbarrow everywhere you go OR have your office booby-trapped by Ewoks

9. Al Gore or Controversy?

December 1, 2009

Would you rather have a miniature Al Gore follow you around wherever you go giving you eco-tips OR be incredibly controversial

8. Masturbation or Drunkest Moments?

December 1, 2009

Would you rather mix-up the words "football" and "masturbation" OR have to re-live all of your drunkest moments?

7. Pooparazzi or Asshole?

December 1, 2009

Would you rather be swarmed by the paparazzi every time you have a bowel movement OR be a total asshole?

6. Chuck Norris or Pink Dildo?

December 1, 2009

Would you rather only be able to open doors by kicking them in like Chuck Norris OR have to carry a bright pink dildo with you everywhere you go?

5. Cartoon or Bourne Identity?

December 1, 2009

Would you rather your life be a cartoon OR all of your petty arguments erupt into Bourne Identity-style fight sequences?

4. Civil War or Press Conference?

December 1, 2009

Would you rather have to take all of your dates to Civil War reenactments OR have to give a live press conference immediately after getting laid?

3. Tinman or Studio Audience?

December 1, 2009

Would you rather have to dress like the Tinman OR live your entire life in front of a live studio audience?

2. Tennis Ball Machine or Ski Boots?

December 1, 2009

Would you rather have all of your meals served to you through a tennis ball machine OR you have to wear ski boots on the weekends?

1. Dikembe Mutombo or Purple Gatorade?

December 1, 2009

Would you rather have to shower with basketball legend Dikembe Mutombo every day for the rest of your life OR have all of your bodily fluids come out purple, like in the Gatorade commercials?