Virile Viewing: Beer Maker Releases Viagra-Laced IPA for Royal Wedding
by Richard Sharp
Having trouble getting it up for the "Royal Wedding of a Lifetime"?
In honor of the union of Prince William and Kate Middleton on April 29th, BrewDog, Scotland's largest independent brewery, has announced the limited release of Royal Virility Performance, "a beer to stir the loins of newlywed princes, summon the ghosts of long gone princesses and cure the stammer of stuttering kings."
Royal Virility Performance "contains Viagra, chocolate, Horny Goat Weed and ‘a healthy dose of sarcasm’," according to the label.
A press release on the BrewDog site explained why the very vocal advocates of "punk brewing" decided to brew up the rather inspirational beer:
"With this beer we want to take the wheels off the royal wedding bandwagon being jumped on by dozens of breweries; The Royal Virility Performance is the perfect antidote to all the hype. A beer should be brewed with a purpose, not just because some toffs are getting married, so we created something at our brewery that will undermine those special edition beers and other assorted seaside tat, whilst at the same time actually give the happy couple something extra on their big day."
Brew Dog apparently actually sent one of their virile ales, appropriately enough, to the future king in preparation for his big night.
“We put a bottle in a jiffy bag marked ‘Prince Willy, Buckingham Palace’. We sent it by Royal Mail as we presume they are most likely to know where he lives. As the bottle says, this is about consummation, not commemoration, so we hope he gets it," James Watt, "Head of Stuff" at BrewDog said.
Assuming this is at all legit (which it may or may not be - mind you, these daffy lads also bottle very strong beer in dead squirrels), you can order one of your very own for the low low price of £10.00. The brewery will only produce 1,000 bottles, and will be shipping orders on the 28th of April.