Watch The Cramp Twins

TV-Y7
2002
1 Season
6.1 (3,319)

The Cramp Twins is an animated comedy television show that aired from 2001 to 2005. The show is set in the imaginary town of Soap City, and the story revolves around the Cramp twins, Wayne and Lucien. Wayne and Lucien are identical twin brothers, but they are the opposite of each other in every way. Wayne is a popular, athletic and outgoing boy, whereas Lucien is more introverted, diabolical and has a love for all things creepy and scary.

The show follows the daily lives of the two brothers, as they get into all sorts of misadventures and face various challenges. The show is known for its unique animation style, which is a blend of both traditional and digital animation. The animation is colorful and lively, and the character designs are simple yet distinctive.

The voice cast of the show is exceptional, and includes Ian James Corlett as Wayne, Tom Kenny as Lucien, Tabitha St. Germain as Wendy, Cathy Weseluck as Tony, Terry Klassen as Mr. Cramp, Nicole Oliver as Mrs. Cramp, Lee Tockar as Mari, Kath Soucie as Lucretia, Jay Brazeau as Manly, Colin Murdock as Dirtbike Kid, David Kaye as Mr. Winkleman, and Jayne Paterson as Spitzy.

One of the show's strong points is its humor, which is both witty and surreal. The show uses absurd situations and visual gags to convey its humor, and the voice acting adds another layer of comedy to the show. The humor is suitable for both children and adults, and the show's creators manage to strike a balance between the two.

Another aspect of the show that stands out is its depiction of sibling relationships. Wayne and Lucien's relationship is at the heart of the show, and the show delves into the dynamics of sibling relationships. The show explores the love-hate relationship that exists between siblings, and how they learn to appreciate and understand each other.

The show is also notable for its portrayal of small town life. Soap City is a quirky town that is full of eccentric characters, and the show uses this setting to its advantage. The show highlights the idiosyncrasies of small town life, and how it affects the characters that live there.

Overall, The Cramp Twins is a hilarious and entertaining show that manages to strike a chord with viewers of all ages. The animation is vibrant, the voice acting is superb, and the humor is top-notch. The show manages to stand out in a crowded field of animated shows, and it is a testament to the show's creators that it is still remembered fondly by fans years later.

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Seasons

24. Weepy Wayne / First Crusher

September 18, 2003

"Weepy Wayne" When the hero of an action movie, "Ride Tough", has to leave his motorbike behind, Wayne gets a tear in his eye. Lucien and Tony see him crying, but he denies it - a little too loudly - and the girls in the row in front of him hear too. The next day the rumour goes round the whole school. Wayne gets even more defensive. He doesn't cry and he challenges any kid in the school to make him. Miss Hissy takes an interest and supports Wayne's Teardrop Challenge, but try as they might nothing anyone does can make Wayne cry. At least not until Lucien suggests they take him to see the sequel to the original movie, "Ride Tough II".. "First Crusher" When O'Pappy's carnival comes to town, Wayne hears about the prize money offered to anyone who can stay in the ring with Crusher Calhoun. He decides to become a wrestler and take on the Crusher. Dirty Joe teaches him a special move and Wayne practices on his father, bringing him to tears. Lucien meanwhile is appalled that the carnival has a freak show. And Tony claims that O'Pappy tried to kidnap him last year. Lucien doesn't quite believe that, but sets out to do an exposé on O'Pappy anyway. What he discovers however is that masked wrestler, the Crusher is a lady! Wayne gets beaten in the ring, but when Lucien tells him the wrestler was a lady, Wayne finds himself in a whirlwind of emotion. He waits in her trailer for her to come back, and tries to wrestle her again but only ends up being beaten up worse than ever. O'Pappy comes to apologise to bed-ridden Wayne for the assault. It turns out the Crusher is his wife. Wayne asks for the prize-money to make amends, which he discovers is only 5 and not 500 dollars! But O'Pappy says he can name his price if he brings him the tiny kid....

23. Worm Funeral / One Sock Wonder

November 8, 2003

"Worm Funeral" Lucien is distraught when his oldest worm dies suddenly. Strangely moved by his brother's grief and fascinated with the dead worm, Wayne agrees to take care of "the arrangements". Lucien is grateful for the trouble Wayne has taken. Wayne has discovered a genuine natural talent and is enjoying himself so much that he is soon looking for other "subjects" on which to practice his new hobby. One by one, Lucien's meticulously assembled collection of scientifically correct teddies of endangered species go missing. Wayne is really starting to express himself. Lucien's teddies are now truly endangered. He must find a way to divert his brother's interest from this morbid practice before his collection is decimated... "One Sock Wonder" When Lucien tells his mother that Wayne is wearing dirty clothes again he sets Wayne up for an unexpectedly major humiliation. Mrs. Cramp insists Wayne take off his dirty clothes, but not only are Marsha and Tandy there, Wayne has not bothered to put on any underpants. He was using his last pair as the spring for a boy-trap. Wayne vows major revenge on Lucien, but he has no clean socks to put on. So Lucien lends Wayne a pair of musical socks and Tony hears him coming. Wayne soon wises up to this trick and tries to sneak up in bare feet - but Tony smells him coming. Wayne decides to put his feet in plastic bags... until he remembers his untested boy-trap!

22. The Bad Seed / Rodeo Rita

November 1, 2003

"The Bad Seed" Tony puts the idea into Lucien's head that perhaps he's adopted. This seems to make perfect sense and Lucien decides to find out. He goes to the Town Hall and with the help of Clerk John, sets about looking up the family details. There in a huge ledger are the whys and wherefores of every Cramp that has ever lived in Soap City... except one. A page has been torn out. Who is the mysterious missing Cramp? Mr. Parsons tells a fascinated Lucien the story of the Bad Seed....an infamous Cramp from generations back who terrorised Soap City with his outlaw antics. Lucien tells his family. Mr. and Mrs. Cramp don't want to know about rotten apples in their ancestral barrel, but Wayne is absolutely thrilled. This guy sounds just like him. Wayne sees himself as the new and improved bad seed!! Wayne sets about living up to his predestined fate. He was born to be bad. He just can't help himself. Wayne tries to be an outlaw that his ancestor would have been proud of. Lucien must try and stop Wayne's reign of terror while uncovering the truth behind the Bad Seed. When he finally does, thanks to some ingenious detective work, he is in for a major shock!! "Rodeo Rita" When Mr. Cramp learns that his favourite Country and Western singer is coming to town he is delighted. He tries to whip up enthusiasm among the family, but nobody else seems in the least interested. So Mr. Cramp decides to institute a cowboy week to win them over. The boys are forced to ride to school on a donkey, wear cowboy clothes, do cowboy activities and end the week with a big campfire and sleep-out under the stars. Then the boys discover Rodeo Rita in a donut shop and decide she is a fake. They try to convince their Dad of the truth, but he doesn't believe it until the night of the concert when he sees Rodeo Rita for himself...

21. Petrified Poodles / Harp Wars

October 25, 2003

"Petrified Poodles" Wendy arranges for Wayne to come in and look after the animals when the Winkles are on holiday, little realising that all he wants to do is watch the big TV. After a few days Lucien gets worried and goes to check on the animals for himself. He finds them in distress, but too nervous for him to approach. With Tony's help however he manages to feed and look after them all and even get the poodles out of the house and into the swamp, where they romp and wag their tails for the first time ever. On their return they discover the Winkle's have returned home and have to quickly wash the muddy dogs before Mrs. Winkle sees them. They manage this, but Wayne gets in trouble when Mrs. Winkle sees her poodles have been towel dried. "Harp Wars" When Wendy becomes frustrated with trying to play any of her many musical instruments she dumps them on the school as the Wendy Winkle Endowment for the Arts. The only problem is she has a six-month block of paid-for music lessons. The instruments are distributed and Wayne gets the biggest which is the harp. This makes Lucien extremely jealous and Mr. and Mrs. Cramp extremely happy. No matter what he does they now see Wayne as their prodigy and Lucien becomes the invisible twin. Wayne is delighted and takes full advantage of his new status, until he realises he is at risk of inheriting a six-month block of paid-for music lessons...

20. Great Bowl of Fear / Mud Crush

October 11, 2003

"Great Bowl Of Fear" Wayne has a new hobby - fishing in the toilet. Prissy Lucien, desperate to avail himself of the facilities and uncomfortable with "going" anywhere but home, tries various ruses to get Wayne out. When he tries to scare Wayne that he might catch a sewer crocodile, Wayne simply feeds out more line. However when Lucien and Tony Parsons discover Wayne's lure floating in the swamp, they concoct a scheme to frighten Wayne out of the toilet. And Wayne finally gets a catch that scares him witless... "Mud Crush" When Lucien spends the night at Tony's house he gets a goodnight kiss from Mrs. Parsons that leaves him awestruck. Her skin is so soft and smells earthy and sweet like crushed grass. Tony explains that she uses special mud from the swamp. Lucien shows his mother some of the special mud. At first she is suspicious, but when she sees how it changes her skin, she can't get enough of it. Lucien is happy to oblige until he realises that his mother and Wayne have hatched a plan to go into business with Marsha and Tandy selling mud door to door as a new beauty aid. Lucien is devastated - unless he can find a way to stop them he will have played a role in destroying a small part of the environment.

19. Food Fight / Mari Mania

October 4, 2003

"Food Fight" When Wayne wins a cross country race that takes Lucien all day to complete, Lucien becomes curious about Wayne's new high in additives cereal. Wayne won't let him taste so Lucien buys his own box, swaps it for the contents of his usual Nature Bits cereal and secretly begins eating it. Soon Lucien is transformed into pro-active, busy, over-confident new Lucien, attracting a gaggle of little girl admirers. But when he whips them up into a fury campaigning against his mother in her own home, even Mari thinks he's gone too far! She reveals Lucien's cereal secret to his mother, who soon removes the added ingredient returning her son to his normal condition. "Mari Mania" Mari's mother wants to take a new family photo, because Mari looks grumpy in the old one. Mari is horrified. Meanwhile Lucien has problems of his own. He's discovered a hairy worm and wants to take it to the vet to see what's wrong. He and Tony set out for the vet, but getting there is not so easy. Someone has been playing pranks all over town and brought the sheep-like Soap City citizens to a stand-still. When Lucien discovers its Mari behind it all he has to confront her with the consequences of her treachery and try to make her put her wrong doings right...

18. The Great Luciani / Wendy Boy

September 27, 2003

"The Great Luciani" Wayne gets a magic set in the hope of making people of his choice disappear. He is very disappointed when it doesn't work. Mr. and Mrs. Cramp send Lucien to help him read the instructions and Wayne convinces Lucien to do a magic show and make him disappear. Lucien agrees, but when Wayne disappears he can't get him back. Mr. and Mrs. Cramp are furious with Lucien and he's in trouble at school too. Lucien holds out for a logical solution and sets out for the dump to find Wayne and bring him home. "Wendy Boy" When Wendy discovers that Mr. Winkle is keeping all the presents she has given him in a drawer, she thinks he doesn't like her. He denies this, saying he likes things that are hand-made, so Wendy gets Lucien to show her how to make something. Mr. Winkle pretends to like it, so Mrs. Winkle makes his room over to match in flowery fabric. Mr. Winkle is horrified complaining that he doesn't like girly things. Wendy asks Wayne to show her how to be a boy. Soon she is belching at the table, walking around in a string vest and giving away her teddies. But although she can even out-do Wayne at certain boyish activities, she decides she's better off being a girl after all.

17. Hotel Hysteria / Alien Glow

September 13, 2003

"Hotel Hysteria" When Mrs. Cramp decides to extend her kitchen to accomodate a new autoclave for sterilising the dishes, Wayne suggests they save money by doing it themselves. With Mr. Cramp's consent and encouragement, Wayne knocks down the kitchen wall and almost collapses the whole house. The family ends up having to survive together in a cramped hotel bedroom until the works are done. This is not easy. Lucien then realises he's forgotten to bring his worms and has to go back to the house to rescue them. Wayne follows him and blackmails him into colluding in a candybar fraud. "Alien Glow" After seeing an alien invasion movie, Wayne is excited by the prospect of an alien invasion. He starts to try to find evidence to convince Lucien that aliens are coming, but Lucien is not so easily impressed. Then one night they see an unexplained glowing light outside zig-zagging around outside the house. Finally Wayne has evidence which Lucien can't explain, but still nobody believes him. Wayne is exasperrated. So as Lucien and Tony set out to discover the cause of the mysterious glow, Wayne disguises himself as an alien and sets out to make people believe in an invasion is happening now.

16. Walk Like a Man / Bouncy Bob

June 7, 2002

"Walk Like A Man" Tired of Wayne's juvenile behaviour, Lucien creeps into his room in the middle of the night, glues bushy tufts of hair under his arms and paints stubble on him. The next morning he convinces Wayne that he has become a man - he must just be an early developer. Wayne is initially horrified but later thrilled and plunges into his new found manhood with macho relish. Mr. Cramp takes Wayne off to buy him bigger underwear and later invites him into the shed. Among the more delighted of his peers is Wendy Winkle who falls more deeply in love than ever with this man amongst boys. Unfortunately for Lucien he discovers that the grown up Wayne is even more unpleasant than the childish version. Lucien needs to find a way to dstroy the monster he has created and Wayne, after a visit to Chateau Winkle discovers the true horrors of manhood. "Bouncy Bob" A new craze is sweeping through school, a pogo-stick type toy called a "Bouncy Bob". All the kids have one. Lucien feigns disinterest telling Mari it's a commercial ploy, but the truth is he can't actually do it. When Wayne knocks him flat he gets sent home from school early with a bump on the head and attracts the attention of his father. Mr. Cramp tells him he was a loser at school too and vows to help him learn to "Bouncy Bob" with the best of them. He keeps him off school with "boy troubles" and they practice together day and night. Lucien practices day and night until he finally gets the hang of it. He goes into school and shows off his new talents, only to find out the craze is finished and everyone thinks "Bouncy Bobs" are lame now.

15. Miss Kissy / Friend Fight

May 31, 2003

"Miss Kissy" When Wayne sees Miss Hissy after school with a man she assumes he has a boyfriend and gleefully spreads the story around the school. He leaves a signed characature of Miss Kissy with big kissy lips on the blackboard. She catches him and gives him a humiliating detention where she takes him on errands and makes him carry her handbag in public. Now Wayne is even more determined to find out who her boyfriend is and tell everyone. But when he follows her after school she goes to visit Dirty Joe and Wayne is distraught. This is one rumour he doesn't want to spread! "Friend Fight" When Lucien laughs at Tony for believing in the newt man, Tony calls Lucien a "soap sucker" and soon they are having an argument from which neither one wants to back down. When Tony comes to apologise the whole argument starts up again. Lucien says Tony's not his friend anymore. Wayne delights in torturing Lucien by letting Tony be his friend instead. But Wendy is not too happy with this arrangement either. She sets out to get Lucien and find a way of getting the little swamp person (Tony) away from her beloved Wayne again.

14. Wolfman Wayne / Shed Dead

May 10, 2002

"Wolfman Wayne" When Lucien and Tony decide to find out whether additives in dog biscuits make dogs hyperactive, they don't want to test them on dogs which would be animal testing. So they test them on Wayne, but they tell him it's an experiment to see if he'll turn into a wolfman. Wayne thinks this is very cool indeed and so eats as many dog biscuits as he can. He does indeed become very hyperactive, but to make matters worse he believes he really is becoming a wolfman. Wayne stays up all night running around and is discovered in the morning worrying Mrs. Winkle's poodles. "Shed Dead" Following yet another failure to stay on the bucking bull at the Haz Chem Country and Western Club, Mr. Cramp decides to put in some practice. Wayne decides to really put Mr. Cramp to the test by attaching Mr. Cramp's sawhorse to an old washing machine. Now it bucks so hard that the horse breaks and Mr. Cramp's whole shed shakes to pieces. Mr. Cramp buries both the horse and the shed and gives up the cowboy life for good. Mr. Cramp has nothing to do anymore, so he decides to hang around with Mrs. Cramp and the twins and this soon drives them all crazy. It's not long before they are hatching a scheme to get Mr. Cramp back in the saddle again.

13. The Prize Swallow / Ice Scream

May 3, 2002

"The Prize Swallow" Wayne decides switch brands of breakfast cereal to get the free bird call Lucien has been waiting for: The Crested Marsh Swallow. He teases Lucien with it mercilessly, even using an amp and loudspeaker to blast the bird call at him and ends up attracting a huge flock of the creatures to the house. The birds refuse to leave in spite of Mr. Cramp's best efforts, but when Mr. Winkle offers money to catch them Mr. Cramp and Wayne change tactics. It seems the birds are a delicacy of swamp people cuisine. Lucien and Tony take the amp and speakers to the swamp in a last ditch attempt to attract the birds back and save them from Mr. Winkle's stomach. "Ice Scream" Every time Marco, the ice cream man, comes by, Wayne rides around on his bike frightening children and stealing ice creams. Tony and Lucien can't stand it any more. Tony makes up a story to scare Wayne about the ghost of Johnny No Teeth who stole ice creams and he shows all the kids "teeth" growing in the ground to prove it. Soon the kids are too frightened to come out at all and Marco gives up on the neighborhood. Lucien realizes they've gone to far. Then Wendy figures out that the "teeth" in the ground are actually radishes. She takes one into show and tell and the kids come back to the streets again. The ice cream man comes back too, only it isn't Marco, but an impostor with no teeth!

12. Grandma's Piano / Guide Games

April 26, 2002

"Grandma's Piano" Mrs. Cramp's mother comes for a visit, bringing a baby grand piano with which she hopes to find out whether there's an ounce of talent or culture in her grandchildren. The old lady is thoroughly unpleasant to everyone, complains about everything and ignores Mrs. Cramp, who wants desperately to please her. She mistakes Tony Parsons for her son-in-law, causing Mrs. Cramp to introduce her husband as the piano teacher when he arrives home for dinner. In the end, Lucien's stilted rendition of Brahms' Lullaby almost drives Grandma out of the house, but when Wayne throws Tony into the piano and begins banging away at it, it's music to Grandma's ears. To everyone's horror, she decides to extend her visit indefinitely. "Guide Games" It's a "soap day" in Soap City. Flakes from The Haz Chem soap factory are falling all over town, making it look like a picture postcard winter wonderland. Wayne and Lucien get engaged as guides for a family of tourists. Wayne's tour emphasizes such amusing local oddities as the stream that turns toenails pink and the orange geyser that dissolves metal. Lucien wants the tourists to understand the toxic effects of the factory's chemical emissions. While most Soap City residents have developed immunity to them, the Swamp folk have not. And neither, of course, have the tourist.

11. Twin Studies / Birthday Blues

April 19, 2002

"Twin Studies" When twin psychologist, Miss Monkfish, comes to Soap City to prove her theory that all twins are alike, Mr. Winkle volunteers the Cramps. Miss Monkfish seems blind to the twins obvious differences, so Lucien sets out to prove her theory wrong. Unfortunately Miss Monkfish is not above altering the evidence to prove her own theory right and to make matters worse the more frustrated Lucien becomes, the more he appears to behave like Wayne. Finally Wayne gets revenge for both of them. "Birthday Blues" When Wendy Winkle invites everyone in Soap City to her bithday party, Mr. and Mrs. Cramp set out to make a big impression. Seeing the event as an investment in their future they buy everyone new clothes and an extravagant doll's house as Wendy's present from Wayne. Lucien volunteers to knit Wendy a sweater with the plan of knitting in an environmental message. Wayne takes more drastic action. With the aim of making Wendy hate him once and for all, he replaces the doll's house with a rusty engine block and fills Lucien's wrapped up presents with moths. But no matter how badly Wayne behaves, he can do no wrong in the eyes of Wendy.

10. Workout / Sixth Senselessness

April 12, 2002

"Workout" The Cramp Twins have been given a school project to learn about work by finding a job they can help with. Mr. Cramp wants his sons to come soap selling with him, but they already have other plans. But when Lucien's dream job fails to materialise, he ends up going soap selling after all. Unfortunately he becomes concerned about the side-effects of Mr. Cramp's products and ends up ruining his sales. Then Mrs. Cramp bans Wayne from the dump and he goes out soap selling too. Only Wayne turns out to be an excellent salesman due to his impressive ability to tell an unblinking lie. "Sixth Semselessness" When Lucien manages to find Tony's sisters shoe in the swamp, Tony convinces him that he is psychic. Lucien becomes convinced of his new powers himself, until he fails to guess what colour socks Mari has on. Then Mari starts to convince him that he is not psychic at all and the whole thing is in his imagination. Lucien becomes confused and sleepless, especially when Tony convinces him that he might be able to read Wayne's mind. But when he forgets to study and fails his school test, Lucien decides Mari was right. The scariest thought however is yet to come, perhaps Wayne is the one who is psychic after all!

9. Big Baby / Ad Bad

May 5, 2002

"Big Baby" The Cramp family gain an unexpected houseguest: the twin's five year old cousin Baby, who looks and acts like a baby, despite her advanced years. Lucien and Wayne quickly discover that Baby is their arch-nemesis in life because whenever they turn their backs she takes immense joy in leaping upon them and riding them like a pony. The Twins attempt various ways to get rid of their torment but don't succeed until Baby finds a particularly appetizing pair of backs, those of Mr. and Mrs. Winkle. "Ad Bad" Lucien comes upon an flyer for Parsons Plumbing, advertising Tony Parsons' skills as a pipe-crawler. Lucien is at first concerned that his diminutive friend is being ruthlessly exploited, but Tony convinces him that drainage work is a great and noble Swamp Folk tradition. Hearing about Tony's profession, Wayne sets out to sabotage Lucien's sleepover with Tony by clogging the pipes of the Winkle mansion with Wendy's favorite doll - -her little effigy of Wayne himself. During Tony's subsequent descent into the bowels of Chateau Winkle he discovers evidence of Mr. Winkle's Swamp Folk origins. It looks as if The Grand Bubba's dark secret will at last be revealed to the world until Mr. Parsons--in exchange for a generous bonus check from Mr. Winkle--manages to convince Tony that he was mistaken.

8. Nostalgia Nasty / Haircut Horrors

March 29, 2002

"Nostalgia Nasty" Wayne's discovery of an old-fashioned cast-iron laundry mangle sends Mr. and Mrs. Cramp into a full-blown nostalgia mania. Lucien is driven nuts by his parents' new obsession, especially since all the fake old-time junk they start acquiring seems to end up harming him. To put an end to the madness, Lucien arranges for the family to have a pioneer adventure in the Parsons' primitive cabin back in the deepest, darkest Swamp. It isn't long before the Cramps learn that the good old days probably weren't so good after all. "Haircut Horrors" Mrs. Cramp decides the boys need haircuts, but Wayne doesn't want a haircut, preferring to look like a favorite wrestler. When Mrs. Cramp meets the new barber, she decides he is too dirty to cut the boys' hair. Wayne is delighted. Mrs. Cramp spreads the word among the Executive Moms, while Wayne develops his wrestling image and encourages Lucien to do so too. Mrs. Cramp threatens to cut their hair herself, but then the new barber comes back to Mrs. Cramp begging for help. She cleans up his shop using a homemade barbercide that inadvertently makes the boys' hair spiky and green. Wayne is delighted. Mrs. Cramp is appalled. The barbershop closes and is replaced by a bakery.

7. Sick Daze / Picket, Picket

March 22, 2002

"Sick Daze" When Wayne sees Miss Hissy send Mari home from school for being sick, he decides to get sick too and goes out trying to catch flu germs from other children. The plan works and Wayne is delighted, but Lucien realises what torments his brother has in store. Mrs. Cramp's cures are worse than the flu. Lucien is determined not to get ill and decides to protect himself with Tony's herbal remedy -chewing swamp tulip petals. Wendy comes round to "look after him" and ends up seeing him naked in the bath. Wayne's only consolation comes when Lucien returns home without his shirt on. He has broken out in a rash from his swamp tulip vest and consequently caught the flu too so they both end up in Mrs. Cramp's care, stuck in front of snow TV in linked treatment helmets like siamese twins. "Picket, Picket" Strange things are happening in Soap City. Cars are crashing left and right, Wayne is filling his room with wreckage, Mari Phelps is turning into a fashion-mad mall rat, and everyone in town is rushing to buy new eyeglasses. When Lucien sets out to get to the bottom of it he quickly discovers that the cars are crashing because the pickets in the fence along the street are so close together that drivers going past them are being strobed into blindness. But who could be behind such a diabolical plot? Could it be Dirty Joe, whose scrapyard business is burgeoning with the influx of all the wrecked vehicles? Or Mari's father, the optometrist, who's doing a land office business in new spectacles? Or maybe even Tony Parsons' family, who are profiting from the demand for special Swamp remedies for the injuries everyone is sustaining in the crashes? The truth will turn out to be more than Lucien can bear.

6. Home On the Range / Holesome

March 15, 2002

"Home On The Range" It's the day of the annual The Haz Chem Country and Western Club barbecue, the biggest event on the Soap City social calendar. Mrs. Cramp sees the occasion as an opportunity to show off Wayne and Lucien in their brilliantly clean matching white cowboy outfits. Mr. Cramp hopes to impress Haz Chem president Walter Winkle and perhaps advance his club rank from the lowly Farmhand Grade Three. But for Wayne and Lucien, the barbecue is just another battlefield on which to carry on their endless sibling war. When Lucien and Tony Parsons load up Wayne's underpants with vicious fleas and maneuver him into a disastrous squaredance with Mr. Winkle's cryBaby daughter Wendy, "a fun day is had by all." "Holesome" Mrs. Cramp is having one of her periodic attacks of "The Cleanies." She's invented a powerful new cleanser and she's determined to give it a clinical trial. Unfortunately the nearest guinea pigs to hand are Mr. Cramp, Wayne and Lucien, all of whom have suffered burns, rashes and blisters from her caustic compounds before. So it's every Cramp man for himself as they desperately try to escape Mrs. Cramp's experimental clutches. But how long can any mere male hold out against the wiles of a woman in the throes of "The Cleanies?"

5. Silence Please / Fur Fungus

March 8, 2002

"Silence Please" Lucien sets about creating healthful "Quiet Zones" throughout the Cramp house, inspiring Wayne to retaliate with some aggressive domestic re-zoning of his own. Their slow-motion civil war escalates until the entire house is rigged with the twins' booby-traps--just in time for the monthly meeting of Mrs. Cramp's women's Cleaning Support Group. When all the traps spring at once, it looks as if Mrs. Cramp's social status will be demolished, but it turns out that the compulsively neat ladies are delighted with the chance to test their cleaning mettle against a real mess. "Fur Fungus" After taking a toy from one of Tony Parsons' sisters, Wendy Winkle discovers that all of her precious Fuzz Babies have become infected with a horrifying fur fungus. Unable to tolerate the idea of other children having beautiful, healthy toys while all of hers are ruined, Wendy convinces her father to have every Fuzz Baby in Soap City shaved. A reign of terror grips the town. At the Cramp house, Wayne tries to take matters into his own hands by subjecting Lucien's Fuzz Babies to a crude fur-removal machine of his own invention. The reign of terror ends when Lucien and Tony visit Wendy Winkle and convince her that the swamp toy she took from Tony's sister is the source of all the trouble. They insist that she return it to its rightful owner and promise that every Fuzz Baby in Soap City gets a brand new coat of fur - -including Wayne, who managed to shave his own head along with Lucien's Fuzz baby llama.

4. Swamp Fever / Kung Foolish

March 1, 2002

"Swamp Fever" When Miss Hissy tells her class that the Soap City Council is going to get rid of the swamp, Lucien and Mari try to find a way to save it. With Tony's help they start a campaign to protect the home of the rare Hairy Marsh Snail, but Wendy Winkle's plan to build an amusement park proves much more popular. Wayne is backing it all the way in the hope of being the one to actually blow up the swamp. With Mr. Winkle controlling the city council, the swamp seems doomed, until Mr. Parsons threatens to reveal Mr. Winkle's secret Swamp Person identity and Tony disguises himself as the last and cutest Hairy Marsh Snail ever. "Kung Foolish" After being bested in a fight by Wayne for the zillionth time, Lucien decides to enroll in a martial arts course, convinced that he can learn to use his brother's superior size and strength against him. During his training Lucien manages to inflict considerable damage to a hand-knitted Wayne dummy, a feat that scares the real Wayne into enrolling in a martial arts course of his own. Unwittingly however, Wayne chooses a teacher who emphasizes the spiritual side of combat and becomes uncharacteristically meditative and passive. No matter what Lucien does to provoke him, he just can't goad his newly meditative brother into a fight. That is, until he steals the coveted "combustible space rock" prize from Wayne's training turns out to be no match for the primeval force that is angry Wayne.

3. Mr. Winkle's Monkey / Wicked Wendy

February 22, 2002

"Mr. Wrinkles Monkey" On their annual class trip to the Haz Chem Soap Factory, Lucien and Mari Phelps discover a mangy monkey on the premises. Assuming the hapless animal to be the victim of cruel product testing experiments, Lucien decides he must "liberate" it and take it home with him. The other Cramps are at first appalled with the new addition to their family. The monkey, which Lucien names "Thomas Edison," eats cleaning products, belches bubbles and slaps people at random. It turns out that "Thomas Edison" is really named "Bubbles" and that, far from having been mistreated, he's been living like a king at Haz Chem as the special pet and confidante of Mr. Winkle. Inevitably, The Grand Bubba arrives to reclaim his simian pal, reminding the crestfallen Cramps that "being Boss is nine tenths of the law." "Wicked Wendy" A silent clown shows up at the Cramps' front door, advertising the opening of a new a trampoline amusement park. His creepy performance sparks Wayne's lust to bounce . . . and Lucien's clown phobia. When Wayne snubs Wendy Winkle on his way to the trampoline park, Wendy plots to have her way with him by letting him try the most dangerous trampoline in the world - -the awesome Big Bounce 5000. Wayne inevitably injures himself, if only slightly, and Wendy spirits him off to Chateau Winkle. Under the guise of nursing him back to health, she wraps him in layers of unnecessary plaster of Paris, keeping him immobile and a virtual prisoner in her bedroom. Lucien, meanwhile, is fighting a paralysis of his own, having been immobilized by his dread of clowns. Ultimately Wayne makes his escape from Wendy's clutches and arrives home covered in odd bits of fur and fabric from Wendy's toy vault and muck from The Swamp. His deranged-clown appearance provokes a relapse of Lucien's clown panic and scares Wayne himself out of his wits.

2. Date Dupe / Agent X

February 15, 2002

"Date Dupe" Patsy McCloud, the new girl in school, seems to have taken a shine to Lucien. When she invites him to come over to her house he's overjoyed--a real date! But he quickly tumbles from exhilaration into a downward spiral of self-consciousness and self-doubt. Encouraged by his mother and undermined at every turn by Wayne, Lucien launches into an all-night frenzy of compulsive grooming and obsessive rehearsal of his every move. By the time his big "date" rolls around he's an over-scrubbed, sleep-deprived, petrified zombie. And when he finally gets to Patsy's house he discovers that she never intended his visit to be a date in the first place. She only wanted him to come over to help take care of her pet hamster - -and on that score Wayne has beaten him to the punch. "Agent X" When an enthusiastic kiss from Wendy Winkle leaves an indelible mark on Wayne's neck, Mrs. Cramp is confronted with a cleaning challenge that even she can't conquer. Utterly demoralized by her defeat, she plummets into a spiral of depression and personal hygiene decline that brings her into the custody of the mysterious and spotless Agent X. This charismatic hero of hygiene spirits Mrs. Cramp away to a secret location where he puts her and other lapsed Soap City citizens through a rigorous and bizarre program of cleanliness rehabilitation. In Mrs. Cramp's absence, of course, chaos and filth reign in the Cramp house. By the time she's released from rehab the place is a complete shambles - -a worthy field of battle on which to test her renewed resolve and freshly honed cleaning skills.

1. Fashion Passion / Small Wonder

February 8, 2002

"Fashion Passion" When Wayne shows up for his class photo dressed in outlandishly mismatched clothes and wearing underpants on his elbow, the charismatic new school photographer declares him a fashion original. Suddenly all the other kids want to be just like Wayne, even to the point of carrying around and wearing junk from Dirty Joe's scrap yard. Wayne soon tires of all the slavish imitation and of having to compete with everyone for his junk supply. Lucien suggests that the only solution is to fake his own death, but Wayne manages to dethrone himself as a fashion icon by appearing at school decked out in a pink frock a la Wendy Winkle. "Small Wonder" Tony complains to Lucien about being taken to buy new shoes when his old shoes mean so much to him. Lucien becomes fascinated and undertakes a scientific study of how shoes reflect the life of the person who wears them. Tony comes back from the shops having made a terrible discovery. He appears to be shrinking. Lucien and Tony wonder what to do. Wayne builds a rack to stretch Tony out again, but then Lucien suggests he try wearing Mrs. Cramp's high heels, at least until they figure out a better solution. This is not as easy as it might seem and they go off to the swamp to practice in peace. Mrs. Cramp is appalled to find her high heels caked with a thick layer of swamp muck, but Lucien and Tony realise this is why Tony thought he was shrinking - his new shoes are a layer of muck smaller than his old ones.

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