Ep 11. Neffe and Soullow: Part 1

In this episode of Iyanla: Fix My Life, host Iyanla Vanzant takes on the challenge of helping siblings Neffe and Soullow address their deep-seated issues that have been holding them back individually and as a couple to move forward. Neffeteria "Neffe" Pugh was propelled into the public eye as the sister of platinum-selling R&B singer Keyshia Cole, but also rose to fame in the reality TV show "Frankie and Neffe." She married her longtime partner, Shelby "Soullow" Lowery, with whom she has five children. However, over the years, their relationship has been rocky, plagued with infidelity, and substance abuse that led to violent outbursts and an illegal dabbling in the drug trade.

In part one of the two-part special, Iyanla visits their Atlanta home and quickly gets to the root of their issues. Neffe and Soullow open up about their dysfunctional childhoods, specifically the loss of their father at a young age, physical abuse at the hands of their mother and other family members, and years of substance abuse and criminal activity. Even after finding success with their reality show and book deals, they admit they still clash with each other and often use drugs to cope with their emotional pain.

Iyanla listens with compassion and clarity, offering them her trademark tough love and calling them out on their excuses and self-sabotaging behaviors. She urges them to take stock of their lives, recognize their patterns of behavior, and start taking responsibility for their actions. She also emphasizes the importance of forgiveness, both for themselves and for those who have hurt them in the past.

Throughout the episode, Iyanla delves into the couple's individual struggles, which they admit they've been too afraid to confront. Soullow has been grappling with his addiction to pills, which he uses to numb his emotions and avoid dealing with his past traumas. Neffe, meanwhile, has been struggling with her sense of self-worth and identity outside of her relationship with Soullow and her famous sister. Iyanla encourages them to confront these issues head-on and offers them tools to help them move forward in a healthy and positive way.

As the episode comes to a close, Neffe and Soullow express their gratitude for Iyanla's help and acknowledge the work they have ahead of them. They pledge to stay committed to their healing journey and work together to build a stronger, more loving relationship. Viewers are left with a sense of hope and inspiration that even the most challenging relationships can be healed with honesty, forgiveness, and hard work.